Today is the First Day of the Rest of Your Life

Breakfast overlooking St. Barthelemy started off yet another banner day. And using my favorite quote “today is the first day of the rest of your life” as the catalyst for todays agenda. A ride on the tender over to the pier, and I was in what seemed like a small town in France. Of course I was in the French West Indies, so I guess it would be rather “frenchy”. Very narrow one way streets lined with designer name shops and sidewalk bistros gave me plenty to walk through. I toured many many blocks of shops and then came across the angelican church where I went in to have a chat with God about letting go and accepting certain recent misfortunes of life.

I then ventured up to the top of a hill that has some sort of light house looking structure and two vintage canons of Fort Gustavia. What an awesome view from up there, and a strong breeze felt very nice in the heat of the day. I even took off my shirt for the walk back down into tow. You may be thinking whats the big deal about taking off a shirt… well remember this is French country, and the only overweight people are American tourist because we are such gluttons when it comes to food. I also noticed that almost every french woman smoked and the locals did not have the typical french accents that sounds like they slur and stumble on words. They rattled that sentences right off to each other quickly, in fact a conversation between to frenchmen sounded to me like they were arguing, but I doubt they were.

I stopped at one of the bistros by the harbor and had lunch with some other guest on the cruise that were from Seattle. My cheese burger was 22 euros, and thats just an indication of how expensive it is here. The bigger boats that wish to dock overnight pay 13.80 euros per foot per day port fees. The shops were mostly all high end boutique style stores and the whole district was very very clean and well kept.

A few more blocks of walking and I then had another breakout moment…. You have heard the saying “been there, done that, bought the shirt”… well I actually went in a shop and bought a St Barths T-Shirt, something I have never done was to buy a souvenir shirt. I got back to the ship in time to nap off some of the intense sun and then attend the Bar B Q dinner on the pool decks. As I sat at a table by myself noticing the many other tables filled with couples, I spotted the headliner singer Jane Curry, from the UK standing nearby and I asked if she wanted to join me for dinner. Again, for those that know me, that is certainly probably not what you would expect. We had an interesting continuation of a conversation from the night before and it was very fun for me. Since I have been pretty quiet and to myself most of the week, the opportunity to open up and let out some conversation was quite welcome, and having a conversation with a stunning young woman from the UK was most enjoyable.

Then the tip of the ice burg for the day appears… I dont drink wine and I am a picky eater, yet I am on a Fine Food and Wine Cruise, so I mentioned that I had thought before the cruise started that I might at least taste some wine. Ms Curry suggested I try sveral different selctions, and then Stacy Lill from the DeLille Cellars winery told me that drinking wine was like bungee jumping. Well… I love bingee jumping, so at that point I was “all in”. I tried a Chapellet Chardonnay which I could get down but it seemed a little acidic to me. My next glass was a DeLille Doyenne Roussanne, which was much more palatable to me. I asked some of the other guest just how they could guzzle this stuff all day and not be falling over their feet by evening. The answer was “water”. And so I had had two glasses of wine…. thats two more than I have ever had in my life, so I felt that was enough and gave the water thing a try for the rest of the night.

A couple of spins of Roulette and a few songs by the band “Four” that was playing was about all I needed to round off a breakout day…

So here it is a few hours after wine and no headache (thats a good sign, since I spent the first three days of the retreat with a very aggravating sinus type headache) I shall post the days select pics to facebook and retire to the comforts of my Stateroom that my cabin Steward Raul has readied for me to retire. I am sure I will find a nice chocolate on my pillow and the covers turned slightly for me to slide in for a good nights rest while we sail further south to Les Saintes, Guadeloupe.

Did You Ever Want To Be Someone Totally Different?
Do you often look at your life and wish you had made some drastically different choices you have made that molded who you are today? Well, thats where I am today, and actually for a while now. On one hand I like who I am and my career path and surroundings. But it doesnt take long for me to think about things and wish I was in a drastically different environment with a very different occupation.

I feel I have worked myself into a “rut” that is not easy to just hop out of. I can’t just stop doing my business, as for I have a responsibility somewhat to my clients. Although I could, I would still need to transition my clients to someone else and transfer the information and details of all the web sites I host and built. just quitting, would burn a lot of bridges and make peoples lives difficult for a while until they got all their media sorted out again. Its just not something I could do, since many of my clients have become friends as well and have been with me for many years.

Then there is the house… The current housing market is still pretty dead and my house needs some money put into it to make it worth what i need out of it to get another place or to move somewhere. I am fortunate that my mortgage balance is only about half of what the house is worth, but then my credit sucks, so there is no getting an equity loan to fix it up. Since my mortgage payment is comparable or even less than the cost of most apartments or rental homes, it would be kind of crazy for me to get into a renting situation again.

In my current field of work, I seem to get responses back from big agencies that could really use an asset like me in their organization that say “I have already accomplished a lot in my career”. Is that the politically correct way to say “we see you are very experienced and capable, but we want to hire a green horn for dirt cheap instead”? And thats why I would be quite happy in another field of work, and to be honest it could be just abut anything. I could find joy in working on a team again even if it was at an amusement park. But I already make more than a lot of jobs available. Maybe not by the hour, but overall through the year. So for me to make this major change it would require so many alterations in my life that I just don’t think it can be done without any collateral damage.

Maybe its just the effects of a cold winter alone and due to the economy, my economy has also suffered greatly. I guess I could go on with my “woe is me” rants, but I do know there are people in far worse situations than what ever I can dream up about mine. I really have no right to complain, since God has granted me the choice to take my own path in life even when He had a different opinion. And yet through it all I have still been blessed in many ways that it is almost like telling him I am ungrateful…

But in fact I am grateful very much for what He has given me, and I suppose this feeling will pass… or someday I will be writing theses blog on my lunch break at Disney.